Naranjo Y Otras Cosas de Mercados

Naranjo! Naranjo! Donde estás Banano? Location: Mercado Agrícola de Montevideo, a sort of half food court half mall arrangement near Aguada Park

Estacionamiento para Mercado Ferrando. About half the size of Mercado Agrícola de Montevideo and located in the Cordón neighborhood. A free standing mall food court that happens to have a book store.

Make Montevideo, Great Again! For Perros!

Migracciones: A+++ Customer Service

Today was the uneventually big day where I finally had my appointment at Migracciones in order to begin getting the papers. The papers which would allow for deprecating the empire's set of papers without having a mature latino meatwot.

Pictured is the National Institute of Colonization, about a block and a half from Migracciones.

When I arrived, they had conventiently lost my appointment reservation. Thankfully I had my receipt from the Abitab where I paid for the Tramite in advance, or else I likely would have fallen into will call status waiting like the Dominicans. Instead I was rather promptly handed over to the services of una gordita, just young enough her skin had yet to suffer the coming damage weight accelerates.

For the price of making some eye contact and tossing a few smiles, she dug through my pile of papers and made things happen without the usual local obstructionism. My apostilled birth certificate? No need to find a "certified public translator" and that today was 7 days after the initial 90 days that automatic visa on arrival covers was not a thing asked about. I did however have to leave to to acquire a photograph of myself from a kiosk a block and a half away aptly named "Foto Carnet", and there are still other papers to be acquired1 before the application can be reviewed.

The next step is the Office of National Identification and in the near future2 a cedula of my own.

  1. A "Carnet Salud", One FBI Background check via INTERPOL, and three months of documents showing I have sufficient income to not starve here.  

  2. Apparently they need a week or so to print them  

Receiving A Guest In Montevideo

While we await the report and pictures from Señor Vulpes, a few quick thoughts on recieving a guest here in Montevideo:

  1. Skipping the hostel was a solid move, it appears the recent hostel pest left some other more familiar pests behind when he departed. War, war never changes.
  2. Many theatics were observed in the wild including the profound changes in body language and posturing that occur in mid-heirarchy Latinos when the boss comes around.
  3. On the morning Señor Vulpes arrived, a cambio in the Montevideo Shopping was robbed. The local papers report 2 Millones (archived), currency unspecified were taken.
  4. Meals ranged the spectrum from gas station sanwiches to steaks at a Parilla.
  5. Only a very small portion of the city by geography was explored on this outing.
  6. Management was subjected viewing an excessive amount of caffeine consumption.
  7. Super Mercado Winn Dixie

Privacy And Other Re-Readings


The chocolates to the left featured amongst the full range of monedas Uruguayo1 were an impulse puchase during today's trip to the servicio to pick up a sandwich. At the time I had no idea if they would be any good or not, but the Uruguaya behind me also picked up a few of them. The locals are very suggestible here. Also very agreeable in the sense that in their desire for acceptance, they are very ready to agree with anything you say until imposes on them personally.


I re-stumbled on Mircea's 2014 piece on the privacy problem today. along with the 2013 notice to the world that he was moving on deeper and into Bitcoin to the exclusion of otras cosas. While the opportunity exists, re-reading has become a priority because in spite of washing up here in 2013, I didn't sober up until late 2015, and at that time Qntra was running at full steam and… Memories exist, but the re-reading has to happen.

Bitcoin price movement, or now more appropriately USD price movement, feels a bit 2013. However in that time entire generations of scammers have come, gone, and been disposed of. Who is still out there calling for the head of Matthew N Wright?

Instead as the interior of Africa and those islands north of France are becoming increasingly indistinct, we have hit the point where Bitcoin is beginning to pass everything else in terms of energy consumption. Beating everything else in terms of math was accomplished happened long ago.

It has been a long walk from vague thoughts of bunkers and other common fever dream delusion that hit with the idea of cryptocurrency to the otherwise mundane life characterised by openness and a lack of generally unfounded concern for privacy much less anonymity.


The chocolates were servicably chocolate. I doubt the mimick behind me in line was disappointed in my choice.

  1. The dark copper colored fellow is 50 pesos, the two-toned fellow is 10 pesos and heavier than the 50 peso coin, the remainder are 1, 2, and 5 pesos in the order their size implies.  

Notes From Observing A Latino Junkie On Vacation

Today I celebrate the departure of a god damned junkie from my hostel. An illustration to set the stage:

The creature made its nest on the bottom bunk pictured during a happier time, and pulled down blankets from the bunk above to create a crude sort of privacy screen. There the creature spent the majority of its time passed out.

  • The thing's arrival was heralded by the stain turning on and off the room light repeatedly between the hours of 1:00 and 3:00, an anomalously egregious behavior by Latino standards. This was the initial sign the creature carried defects beyond stupidity.
  • Latino junkies appear to be diurnal creatures. Apart from slow clumsy windows of activity from 9:00 through 10:00 and 22:30 through 1:45, the junkie remained sequestered in its den.
  • During periods of activity the junkie lacked fine and gross motor control.
  • Unlike the recreational cannabis users endemic to Uruguay, the IV drug injecting junkie favored an elaborate water pipe.
  • Other latinos nominally attempted socialization with the junkie, largely unaware of the degree of its profoundly ill and nonsapient condition.
  • This naturalist limited interactions with the stain to disapproving glares and grunts. The creature had opportunities to observe myself being cordial with persons. This successfully reinforce Bingo avoiding behavior, and reinforced its lower status.
  • The only physical evidence observed of its IV drug other than the scabby and emaciated condition of its body was a syringe cap located on the floor of the room yesterday.

The thing has now gone. I can't reasonably guess what its intentions were taking a vacation to see all the sights in a bottom bunk, but until I confirmed its departure, I had a growing suspicion it arrived at the hostel to finish dying.

Back To The Fat Accountancy Discussion

Continuing from the last post, the fat account is the sum total of all value personally accessible to me which has not explicitedly been committed committed to the enterprise. At a time when the naive Bingo who had never left the reservation thought he could get off the plane in early December and bring the republic online before Christmas, end of the month at the latest, and start bringing in revenue… It made all the naive sense in the world to charge food,1 Spanish lessons,2 skirt chasing, etc to the fat waiting for revenue to outrun expenses.

Then reality hits. All of sudden its February, just got online still no revenue from which to draw a salary, you're posting pictures and the manager you have never met notices you have lost weight and offers a per diem. Sure, by the middle of the month everything's blown up and by the end of month things have come together again. Not where I expected when I got off the plane, but not in a bad position.

For having expended the fat I have acquired the foundations for building a life outside the wire. And then there's the education. Yesterday I got to deploy the magic words "… por efectivo" for savings over the firm's catalogue prices. I can inject commentary about mis huevos into conversations. I also have had a number of conversations with people whose only impression of the empire is… Miami… through second and third hand reports. I get to answer the question of where I live with the name of my hostel rather than the place I happen to have came from. Sure, my clothes are still looser, no point replenishing the literal fat too aggressively while the metaphorical fat sits leaner. For the return on investment, this expendature of fat a much better deal than US college was in both time and money.

Thankfully my fellows in the Republic are Republican enough to birth Pizarro, and I am still in Montevideo as history has actually flown this past month instead of in Illinois as it could have flown.

  1. The first week or so while I was still learning pesos are real money hurt a bit more on this line item than time after adjusting to pesos as money  

  2. 300 pesos and hour over three 1.5 hour lessons a week for 1500 pesos weekly or ~53.5 US Dosiedoes weekly  

Burning Fat and Intangibles: Thoughts On AN0 And Pizarro

The new management has taken the great leap of publishing their first draft monthly statement and entered the wonderful world of Republican AN0 accounting. It has been a long journey from hammering out the simple Qntra reports to the directionless November 2017 BBISP statement and eventually to the production of an AN0 compliant December Statement. Part of the transition was the shift to actually working off of the non-zero asset corporation guidelines, instead of trying to reverse engineer them from the statements of MPEx listed ventures. Another part was confronting many of the really hard questions the format demands:

  • Wat do about dose Unified Standard Dosiedoes? In spite of so many expenses being demominated in them, there rightly wasn't the sort of confirmed 2-way liquidity necessary to count them as cash. Thusly they fell into tangibles.
  • Hardware was another tough question. If we were talking about FUCKGOATS with an emerging market denominated in BTC, then it would have made sense to lump them in with tangibles, but… the hardware in question was the network switch and a unbranded server which now is home to Qntra and Pizarro's www presence. Both could expect to be traded through same chain of transactions to BTC. For it having moved, the value the switch could bring through being traded for USD has appeared to have increased though the replacement cost has risen as well. Thusly I sorted them into the intangibles, illiquid unless the venture changes hands… and thankfully it has!
  • Doing business publicly with Mircea in the logs had many pleasant side effect including being able to link to debts in the statement where exactly they were incurred. The logs also carry in the reminder of the lessons learned from baking the wrong documents at the wrong time. And then there are the gems you find browsing the wrong month's logs looking for the right link.
  • Publishing earlier rather than later allows for revision before signing the statement and committing it as a deed.

As management in the person of the honorable ben_vulpes published their first draft of Pizarro's first statment there are indeed questions. A number of these questions are open. There is however one question from directed towards management, which I would like to provide clarity to.

5. why did you consolidate overhead (such as office space rental) into payroll ?

The short reason is that ensuring Bingo's presence related bills due at the end of February for March rents would be provided for, asciilifeform in consultation with other members of the consortium to build Pizarro sent myself 1800 USD via Western Union. Fiat side concerns other than keeping the lights on in the cabinet and making sure Bingo doesn't starve haven't yet recieved much attention yet compared to making sure the Republican side of Pizarro is viable and sanely constructed. By the time the February Pizarro statement is in shape to be signed and deeded, the Republican questions of how to organize and account for Pizarro should be settled leaving the fiat side mess for cleanup.

On the fiat side a number of questions are open. Does management want to continue using me personally as a passthrough on everything, or do they want to split the datacenter from the other Bingo/Presence expenses and bring in a fiat side corp incorporated in a saner land to paper contract Bingo's services. I lean towards the later option for a number of reasons.

  1. The US Passport problem has been a tremendous headache with the banking, and being able to demonstrate 1700-1800 USD a month in income with paper invoices is the sort of thing that can be very helpful making the case for residency. That a substantial chunk of that goes to having a desk, etc for the benefit of Pizarro need not be of any importance so long as receipts can be shown that Bingo is bringing in foreign income a smidge above the median household income and triple the adult mean per capita income.
  2. If the contract for the rack can be moved to a foreign corp there just might be a away for a better accountant to cut some of the sting VAT incurs.
  3. Booking incoming cash for rack payments as income to me with which I pay for the rack as opposed to counting the cash which paid for the rack in my name as the loans they rightly are could lead to a lot of local tax liability unearned by the locals.
  4. The 1700-1900 USD in monthly invoices range seems to hit the magic sweet spot that looks like a life supporting income range while also staying under the cap for my current "pequeña empressa" unipersonal business structure and its favorable tax treatment. The irony in redeeming the 900 USD fucking in December as a way for Pizarro to realize savings by providing an avenue to minimize local libailities seems delicious on its face.
  5. Lumping the recurring expenses into a single "payroll" line item does not preculde Pizarro management's ability to leave a pile of fiat in care of Bingo for incidental, bulky, or or heavy purchases that come along.

However these questions are open questions upon which management may make decisions. On that note with GMT -3 making bedtime approach rapidly, the discussion of accounting fat hinted at in the title will have to wait until tomorrow, or depending on the number of questions maybe even later.

Useful Things For Hostel Living

Here are a few simple things that help to maintain a sanitary and reasonably civilized standard of living in a hostel's dormitory environment:

  • A Bag For Dirty Laundy: I ended up locally acquiring a cheap small woven nylon duffle bag for this purpose. All it has to do is be somewhat breathable and not be one of the bags containing the clean clothing. All sorts of luggage advise using a mesh compartment inside for this purpose. That might work for travelers who are returning to a different home, where you are compeletely emptying the luggage afterwards and likely laundering everything. When you are using a piece of luggage as a wardrobe, the seperation afforded by a different bag for laundry is necessary.
  • Bug Spray: Before departing for a new continent I soaked all my luggaged with the heaviest duty non-organophosphate pesticides I could find with agents covering all stages of the lifecycle of common travel pests. Springing for the nice shit with agents that work against permethrin resistant critters was a wise decision.1 Likewise any new bags, like the laundry bag above get soaked with a locally acquired flea and tick spray before entering the hostel. The idea is making your shit the most hostile place for the fuckers to settle down. It also doesn't hurt to spritz inside the laundry bag before handing it off to the front desk for laundering.
  • A backpack: Not a giant thing requiring a frame, but a schoolbook sized thing which meets the airline "personal item" size requirement winning you a second carry on. I ended up acquiring mine locally however. This carries the items you need to keep on your person that are unwieldy to stuff into pockets. Libros para aprender Español, snacks, tools, etc. The local pussies and Brasileros tend to stuff jackets in theirs because they feel cold when the sun goes down. Another item to thoroughly soak in bug spray.
  • Zippered vinyl bank bags: When carrying cash across borders they convey you are confidently not hiding shit up your ass, and when you settle down you will discover that you rapibly accumulate a fuckton of heavy coins. You need a place you can keep them that isn't going to be destroyed by their heft. You might also accululate other trinkets and miscellanea that needs sorting.
  • Libros para aprender Español. These are surprisingly hard to find in the local bookstores as are libros para aprender Ingles.
  • A lock for your locker.


  1. A problem since remediated for the time being, but given the tourist turnover you never know which dirty motherfucker is going to bring in a new crop of pests.  

Conscious Contact And Other Things

The ritual six months of logreading as initiation has been around for a while.1 Actually reading and getting up to sync is and long has been the minimum that needed crossing to sit at the table. Considering the events of this February and those of past Februaries name change, and the types and varieties of noises recorded in the logs change.

There is a fellow who 47 months ago wrote on the subject of the learning from the logs, yet now the fellow in the icy wastes is fallen out of sync. He lost his conscious contact. Like many a stalled out node he came and stayed a while, made some impressions and drifted off… only to be noticed while firing off a missive while out of sync. Sometimes though, the better part of valor is catching up before firing off the potentially expensive missive.

Other times you have to look backwards to bring light to a problem of the present. Too much money is a problem. There would be quite a number of ways to shortcut bringing and ISP into existence by throwing money at the problem, but capital overallocation has far greater costs than the money. Had I arrived in Montevideo with more cash, say $250,000, and proceeded to attempt starting an ISP with that… all sorts of barriers could have been smoothed over and bulldozed out of the way… BUT

At what cost. If the word gets out that I am bulldozing problems with money, all I have done is painted a giant target on myself asking for people to create problems for me to throw money at. Instead of working on republican values trying to learn to do business more like Mircea Popescu, habits would build and I would be learning to fail like Fred Wilson. Or get milked like the Gringo retirees in Atlantida. Honestly appraising myself as I arrived in Uruguay, I don't see having more fiat demonimated capital on hand leading to any effect other than it getting flushed into all sorts of tin women and away from Republican pursuits.

On that note I picked up a pair of sneakers this week. After nearly 3 months of wearing 5 pounds of leather and rubber out of the house, I am much more maneuverable and a bit more camoflaged. I still wear the boots, but this place is feeling enough like home to not require shodding my feet for invasion everytime I leave the hostel. I still keep the invader mindset.

  1. From Hanbot November 15, 2012:

    Okay, it's not a crime. It's just the first step down the road which brings pretty much 9x% to crime within six months to a year. So, here are some simple easy steps for your convenience.

    0. Starting a bitcoin business is a liability. The first thing you need to understand, and you need to understand it well. At sixteen hundred hours while you were sitting around your living room scratching your ear you were worth X. Your life, your ideas, your business, the shit around your house that you own, all that which makes up your life, added together, worth X. At sixteen fifteen, eight minutes after you had started your Bitcoin business you were worth X-k, where k is always positive and SIGNIFICANT. Starting a Bitcoin business is a liability, it makes you worth less. In fact, all the rest of your life in Bitcoinland will be attempts, more or less successful, to limit and reduce that liability. This is the outlook you must have not in order to be successful, but in order to have a shot at it. This is the outlook you must have in order to not guarantee failure.

    1. Identify yourself to the community. This means, at the very least, creating a WOT account. If you do not have a WOT account you are not part of Bitcoin business. This is the criteria, no matter what you might think. That's where everyone looks, no matter what social media might be telling you. If you aren't in the WOT you aren't in Bitcoin.

    This might also mean making a few social media profiles. The difference between an account on StumbleUpon called MyBTCBiz, a reddit account called BtcBlaBla, a myspace, tumblr, whatever and a forum account called MyBizPr is nil. They're all the same thing: social media profiles. Sure, they may be useful. You wouldn't think to substitute a forum registration for a company registration IRL, now would you? Same thing here.

    2. After completing step 1 spend at the very least six months learning. This attitude whereby you think you're great and valuable, so great and valuable in fact that you had the business idea first, then you ran into Bitcoin and then in the heat of the moment saw to that formality of a forum account so now you're ready for "investment" five hours later after dealing with the pesky minimum posts rules is bullshit. Pure bullshit. This isn't how it works, if you've not been in the WOT for six months you are not ready to start a Bitcoin business for reason of intellectual incapacity, irrespective of what you might think. (And yes, of course you will think you're the exception to this rule. You are not the exception, you are just unskilled and unwarare of it. The rule is exactly about you.)

    Yes, maybe if Warren Buffett decided to go into Bitcoin he'd just put a notice on his Berkshire Hathaway website identifying his WOT handle and be ready in five minutes. The reason Warren Buffett can do that and you can't is that you're not Warren Buffett. Yes, one day you might become the next WB. That doesn't mean you're it today, consumer credit does not work in this field.

    So, what you do during your six months is that

    2.1. You buy some Bitcoins. Get a good idea of what the options for doing that are, how the exchanges work, how the OTC market works (if by now you do not know what OTC or WOT stand for add two months to your lockdown as punishment for being the sort of idiot who, when he encounters words he does not know, instead of investigating their meaning brushes them off to "get on with the reading").

    2.2. You sell some Bitcoins. Get a good idea of how that works, how you get your money back out, what the limits are, so on and so forth. You wouldn't want to discover later that you have a billion dollars in Bitcoins you can never spend in any way, other than by donating to the Bitcoin Gates Foundation now would you? What sort of WB would that be?

    These are not a waste of time. They are here to give you an idea of how your future customers will be seeing life. You want to buy some Bitcoins even if you don't need them, and sell them even if you don't need to and buy back just on general principle. You are unit testing the currency. Boring? Fuck you.

    2.3. You read, on this forum, and you discuss with the market participants. You get your pecking order straight. Who are the movers and shakers? Whose word is worth 10k Bitcoins no questions asked and from whom? Why? You get the history straight. Who were the scammers, historically? How did they do it ? What are the patterns? How did the people who matter react, and why? What does that say about them, how does that color their relationships among each other?

    If you don't have the list and don't comprehend how the interactions work, if you look at DeathandTaxes and have no fucking idea who he is, if you think we're buddies cause I mention him by name and so forth you're not done with this. Must lurk moar.

    2.4. You ask questions. Only on step 2.4 do you ask questions, by the time you're here you have already done a lot of work! You have sunk into this upwards of a hundred hours of your spare time, whether you like it or not, you've filled half a notebook with dumbass scribblings, you have fucking hand-drawn maps hanging from your bedroom wall. This level of intensity is not an upper bound to aspire to, but a minimum requirement.

    Your questions will get a lot of stupid answers but also a complete set of correct answers. Pick the set, disregard the rest, you're on your way.

    3. Announce your business plan. If you think your business plan has to be kept secret because otherwise others will steal it you are probably too stupid to be in business (not just BTC, but in general).

    Let me explain to you how business "stealing" works: at the time MPEx was created (Feb 2012) there existed GLBSE already, which sucked at that time. Nobody flailing around in a cloud of stupidity almost mould-like in consistency seemed to be aware of it, but GLBSE sucked. And so Mr. P decided to make a securities exchange that worked right and was run correctly.

    So, pro tip #1: there's so much to do and so few people capable of doing it in Bitcoin that if your plan makes sense and you seem even remotely competent everyone else who is competent will breathe a sigh of relief. They aren't going to "steal" your idea of doing the absolutely fucking obviously banal, cause so much is needed I couldn't begin to tell you.

    Pro tip #2: if you are incompetent, the people who are competent aren't going to steal your business early. They are going to steal it late, just like MPEx demolished GLBSE. They don't need early mover advantage, they will come to your market six months or a year late, break off your arms and beat you over the head with them until you are reduced to a bloody mess.

    So, forget about anyone "Stealing" your business. When S.DICE was announced, a bunch of forum muppets rambled on about how it's not worth its valuation because "everyone could do it". And I laughed at them then and so to prove my point that they're laughable idiots they declared that they shall do it! It's been months, who has managed to steal the business? You can't steal any business from the competent, and if you're competent yourself you don't even try to, cause it makes no business sense.

    Thus, at the very least, step 3 gives you this measure of protection, whereby other competent people know you're doing X and so don't start doing X too. It saves our time and effort, rather than doing something twice do two of the fifty billion things that still need doing.

    Obviously your announcement will gather a bunch of crap from a bunch of nobodies. But lucky for you, you've been doing this by the numbers, and you have the list. You know why you don't care what Joel Katz says about anything: what people who don't run businesses say is irrelevant. You know why you care what piuk says about anything to do with the blockchain (do you?).

    4. Almost there.

    4.1. If you actually got no objections, just pats on the back you're golden. Go do your thing, try your best not to fuck up, when in doubt ask people you trust and that's that.

    4.2. If you actually had some objections, do not proceed until the people who raised them declared themselves satisfied. The odds that they don't have a point are dismal, and more importantly, the odds that they wouldn't withdraw objections along the lines of the most favorable construction for you are nil. If someone's pointing things out to you that won't work with your model they're right. If nobody is that still is not proof your model can work.

    Stick to this and I might be hearing your name in a year or two. Don't, you just fade into the background noise, yet another of the many who keep paying ten or fifty dollars a month to be part of a new and exciting MMORPG, sorta like the glassy eyed FB credits buyers.