"Oh you're from Venezuela, GO MADURO!"
This, the Venezolana reported yesterday is the most common way that the Uruguayos react to the news that she is from Venezuala. Nevermind that Chavez, Maduro, and their Bolivarian revolution is why she lives in Uruguay as opposed to Venezuela. Similarly when I offer Estados Unidos as my place of origin, the Uraguayo tends to get exicited about Obama before wondering how things could go so Trump…
When I say the Italian descended Uruguayos are not people, it is because they are decidedly not. Left to their own devices they grow into reddit bucket crab form without the need for any discernable Reddit at all. Maybe they get their fake news from Facebook?
This country's saving grace is that the crab people need someone, anyone else to pull their weight for them. Economically the tourists keep things afloat and politically crab people are ineffective. Not comically so, because they aren't people and lack the ability to process or generate humor.
Every day I don't see ships towing Reddit bags past the Rambla and towards the Atlantic is one day too many. Not being people there's a deeply disturbing uncanny valley effect when interacting with Uruguayos, and I would like to be done with it. At least Petrus's folks have some discernable self interest and desires that doesn't lead to absolute nihilism.
87895000 kilograms of trash bagged and towed would probably be sufficient improve morale here significantly. As expensive as Brasilero soy is getting these days, maybe the Chinese would even pay for it? I really want to be done interacting with these things. The zombies are here.